#01 – Aug 26, 2021

What do I do when I find myself feeling lost? To be honest, that happens a lot and I don’t know if I really cope with it. I just kind of accept it. When I was younger I’d tell myself that it will pass and I’ll find a place for myself eventually and find happiness. Now I just accept that this is how life is.

I don’t paint often either, just whenever I feel the need to. It’s a chore for me to unpack all my painting equipment and clean up after, so it puts me off doing it. But once i start, I find it easier to keep painting daily.

It’s comforting to believe things happen for a reason, isn’t it? Sometimes we can look back and see it clearly when things work out. But other times, I feel things were pointless. Maybe they just haven’t come to fruition yet.

I’m afraid I don’t read as much as I’d like to. Did you find a good book to read? If you’re still looking for something, I’d recommend “The Mirror of Light” by Rodney Collin, although I haven’t read it myself. I’ve heard that it’s quite interesting and I wanted to read it too. Maybe you’ll like it.

My greatest dream? Well, I suppose I’d like to be an author one day. Maybe buy a large property somewhere in the countryside to live out the rest of my days. How about you?

I’m glad you didn’t forget. I’ll keep waiting to hear your story then 🙂

I hope you have a lovely week ahead too.

~ R

#02 – Aug 26, 2021

I’ve been well, I guess. Learning new things, practicing mindfulness and enjoying some nice conversations… while in lockdown 🙂

Yes. I already found some good books to read – a great one I just finished reading a couple of days ago is “A Return to Love” by Marianne Williamson. Do you know this book? I’ve just taken a look at the description of “The Mirror of Light”. It seems to be interesting. Hopefully I can find the ebook version of that title. Thank you for your recommendation.

I used to dream of becoming an author when I was a child. What type of writer would you like to become?

Hmm… My greatest dream… I always dream of living somewhere close to nature someday and being able to support people on their self-healing journey as much as I can. Maybe build an intimate small healing community where people can share, be authentic, be vulnerable, learn from and support each other. It’s funny, though. When I was younger, I wanted to live a quiet, self sustaining life in the mountains alone. But then I realized it’s almost impossible for me to live without community. Are you still working toward your dream? (I hope you are)

~ T

#03 – Nov 01, 2021

Hey T, how are you?

Sorry it’s taken so long to reply. Things have been difficult here lately. I’ve wanted to reply to you earlier but haven’t had the energy to write. No, I haven’t heard of “A Return to Love.” I’ll add it to my book list though.

Do you still want to become an author? Well, I’d like to write sci fi, or fantasy books. Maybe even horror would be fun. What type would you like to write?

That’s a nice dream. At one point I wanted to do the same. I thought it would be nice if I could buy a large rural property where I can grow my own food and maybe have a retreat for people who are going through a difficult time. They could come and do workshops and heal from anxiety issues. I even thought if I could buy a large enough place, maybe I could offer some space to Buddhist monks to come and live and run meditation classes for the retreat. But it all seems like too much for me now. Personally, what I want more than anything for myself is to have someone I can completely be myself with and who would love me as much as I’d love them. But I’m kind of drifting toward what you mentioned…living a quiet self-sustaining life alone. It’s not so much out of desire but acceptance. What about your dream…are you still working toward it?

~ R

#04 – Nov 05, 2021

Hi R,

Things have been fine with me these days, maybe it is because I’ve learned to let go of control and accept things as they are instead. Don’t you worry about replying late because just like you, I tend not to write when I’m low.

How are you? I hope you feel better now.

Becoming an author is no longer my dream but I still do want to write a memoir one day. Do you plan to write a book anytime soon? Fantasy and sci fi are great, but I have to admid that I don’t read fantasy as much as I did in the past.

Isn’t it nice living a quiet life, growing our own food and being surrounded by nature? It’d be even more wonderful if we can find and share our life with someone who loves us as much as we’d love them. Yes, it’s not easy but things will happen when the time is right, I believe.

Do you believe in the idea of soulmate?

Yes. I’m still working toward my dream. It’s been a long hard journey but at least I always feel grateful that I know what my dream is and go for it. There are so many things I need to learn and experience. There are also several projects that I want to carry out. But it’s easier said than done. Sometimes I find myself looking out the window while doing nothing but struggling with different feelings and thoughts.

Take good care of yourself and I hope you have a lovely day,

~ T

#05 – Nov 06, 2021

I’ve been trying to let go of control as well, and just accept the flow of the great Tao. But I feel as though it keeps carrying me down wild rapids with sharp rocks. In truth, I’ve still been struggling lately. Even just now, I had an argument with my mother.

How are you feeling today? I hope your day has been better.

I don’t plan on writing a book any time soon, but I want to one day. Just that the series I had in mind has become something of my life’s work. Maybe it’s my divine purpose. But I also feel that it needs more work and time before it can come to fruition. Partly because most good stories need time to ‘ferment’ into something better, and partly because whatever message I’m supposed to send through my writing hasn’t been fully made clear to me yet. Perhaps stories are never really ours. They just come to us from some greater source and it’s our responsibility to pass them on. Sometimes I wonder if just by sharing stories, we give life to the characters in them and they really come into existence in some other reality. I hope I will be able to read your memoir one day!

Yes, that certainly would be wonderful – to live a quiet life, grow our own food and be surrounded by nature. And to be loved by someone as much as we love them. When I was younger I felt I should do as much as I can to make the world better. But I’m finding that not only is it not possible, but that in many ways the world doesn’t want to change. Perhaps it’s not the right time, as you say. Still, it would be wonderful to retreat to some corner of the world with someone special and just forget everything else.

Do I believe in the idea of a soulmate? That’s a difficult question to answer. It depends on a lot…can soulmates exist for some people but not for others? Is it a matter of destiny, or can two people “grow” into being soul mates? If a soul mate is meant to be our perfect match then does that mean we find them when we are in a state where we no longer change or grow, or perhaps we grow with them? I think it’s possible to find someone who can grow with us, with mutual, unconditional love. I think everything people regard as a soul mate is possible, but not necessarily the result of destiny…maybe circumstance. I also think, and hope, that in time we will grow into new beings and our concept of love will grow and expand in ways we can hardly fathom now. Then, maybe the idea of a soul mate will take on a new form as well. What do you think? Do you believe in the idea of a soulmate?

I know that feeling of staring out the window and struggling with feelings and thoughts. The weight of the past, and the pull of the future, tugging in a thousand different directions at once. What are your other projects, Thuy? I’m sure you’ll manage to achieve all that you need and desire to. But remember that if you were to do nothing else with your life other than to exist and breathe, you will have done enough. You cannot fail, because you are already enough. Everything else is just extra credit.

Take care and have a lovely day too. I’m looking forward to hearing from you again!

~ R

#06 – Nov 08, 2021

Hi R,

Today is a nice day and I’m feeling alright. I’m writing this while listening to one of my favorite songs – The Foolish Things by Ella Fitzgerald. I love how stories are beautifully told through music. Do you love music, R? Not long ago, I was so busy with work that I completely lost touch with my inner self. My soul felt dry and empty. During that time, I didn’t listen to any music, I didn’t read anything nice, nor did I feel inspired to write or do anything creative. My dreamy nature was somehow forgotten. I was just numb. Then one day I realized how much I missed my inner self, how much I missed those little moments when I could be fully myself. I knew I needed to slow down to observe my mind and my body. I then spent one whole night listening to old songs while reliving good old days and cuddling with my cat. It was such a wonderful night. I felt as if my soul was renewed again. Music is just healing, you know…

I believe every story has a soul. And so do the characters in them. And perhaps as you say, stories are never really ours. They are just there to be told by us. Maybe the characters already exist somewhere even before we share the stories?… I hope I will be able to read your books one day, too.

If everything happens for a reason, then yes, I believe soulmates exist. But they might not be restricted to romantic partners. And I think soulmates are not necessarily meant to be together forever. Maybe we have more than one soulmate? And I also think they come to our life to teach us lessons, to learn and grow with us, and to remind us of who we truly are. I love the way you think that our concept of love will grow and expand some day as we evolve as a soul. Perhaps we’re all here on earth to learn to love? I’m not really sure… And yes, it’d be wonderful if we could just meet that special someone with whom we can share our life regardless of where we are.

About my projects… Back in university, I started a project which forced me to step out of my comfort zone to talk to strangers, listen to their stories and maybe share them with the world because I always believe in the power of story and that people often have a desire to feel listened to. But shortly after I graduated, I put it on hold. It’s still hanging in the air now. Another project that I have in mind is creating a digital space dedicated to inspiring others to slow down and live intentionally. And learning to play the guitar, if we call it a project :). Do you have any projects that you want to work on?

I remember the time when I told my mother that I was going to quit my full-time job and venture into “the unknown”, we had an argument. Actually, it was more of an “intense” conversation than an argument because I know she was just worried about me. Maybe the way our parents show their love is different from our perception of love but it doesn’t mean their love isn’t real, is it? Do you believe we create our own reality with what we think and what we perceive?

Thank you for the kind words, R. When I was younger, I used to think that nothing I do is enough and that I have to try harder in life. But now I’m just learning to go with the flow and allow everything to be as it is. All I have to do is just enjoy the journey and let life unfold itself. Of course it’s difficult to live that way, especially when life hits you hard. But as long as we’re conscious of the choices we make, then I believe we’ll be alright. Isn’t life a series of choices anyway?
I don’t know what you’ve been struggling with but just like what you said to me, sometimes the best thing we can do is nothing, because we’re already enough. I hope your day has been better now, R.

I’m looking forward to hearing from you again.

Take care and have a lovely day,

~T